HELLO, MY EGG NO.1

This is the first letter I am writing to you.


You are frozen now, far away from my body.


When I was a child, I never doubted that I would one day get married and have children.


I used to play a game with my friends, guessing who would get married first.
That version of myself may still be inside me.


Otherwise, I wouldn’t feel this desire to meet you.

Over the past few years, knowing that you exist has allowed me to look away from many things.
It could be described as an expansion of possibility.


But when it comes to you, it feels more accurate to say that I have been avoiding you.


It feels like watching a single airplane trail drawn across a calm sky,
slowly dispersing as I stare at it absentmindedly.


I still don’t know what kind of feelings I should hold toward you.